She looked into his eyes. A blackened abyss bled from them like a fresh inkblot on a blank page. They sank deep into sockets, smudged like a dark charcoal shadow. A black spell hung over them like a menacing cloud.
A dull shadow emanated from his countenance. Anger, bitterness, and uneasiness flushed from his eyes. Yet his face shown only numbness. He held back the demon, gnashing and clawing to be released. A beast of darkness, pain, confusion, and neglect. His lack of focus, a trait he could not control. He seemed to careen like a car, out of control, over the edge of a cliff. And yet he still held back his demon, knowing if he unleashed it, the result would be catastrophic.
His mesmerizing gaze drew her closer until she found herself plummeting into a black hole. The air grew hot all around then fell cold and clammy. As her vision adjusted to the darkness, flashes of electrifying light raced all around her. Graphic, multi-dimensional images blurred the canvas before her eyes. Each image was random in likeness or purpose. They moved so fast, she barely had time to decipher their meaning, much less the content.
The images intensified, accompanied by a low monotonous buzz. The sound, soft at first, grew with magnitude. With each decibel, it reached a more annoying level. She ignored it at first, as she watched the display of stories dance before her. However, she soon found it more difficult to ignore. The annoyance shifted to pain, an ever increasing pain.
Beads of cold sweat gathered on her skin. The sound became unbearable. Her head pounded with immense pain. The images and sounds intensified and sped up, gathering momentum with each successive story.
Make it stop!
Behind the stage of his mind, she could see his tears and sorrow. He couldn’t control it, any of it. But he dared not move, the demon still buried deep, growing in strength. His mind draped in complete chaos. He couldn’t grasp it, or organize it. He would grasp into the superhighway of realities, thoughts, hopes, and dreams. But it came back empty, blurring through the race, while leaving behind trails of light and smoke that would warp back into the highways and byways as if untouched.
Each time he’d focus on the tasks at hand, the demon would again challenge his strength. Vapors of darkness bled out of the corners of his mind like ghost-like claws ripping the fabric of his unconscious. He would then turn back to keep the beast at bay, while more of his life swarmed about him. The circle was endless and frustrating.
She felt him. And yet, could do nothing. Tears streamed down her face. She withdrew from his mind and again looked at his blank expression. He smiled and assured her all is well, turned, and put on his mask of strength and laughter, to face his next task unfazed.
He never reveals to anyone in the world, the emotionally draining contest that takes place behind the scenes. He’d rather boost his peers, share in their happiness and laugh with them, than bring them down. Sure, he has his moments of relapse, his moments of solitude and breakdown. But they are rare. He grasps his happy place in reality and rides the wave of his passions.
It is said, the eyes are the gateway to the soul; Yet his eyes, shared nothing but chaos. Unorganized, untamed, and unstoppable chaos. You wouldn’t know it. His mask, and heart, hide it well.
Chaos rules his internal world while the demon remains imprisoned. For how long? Perhaps until insanity envelopes him, perhaps forever. No one knows.
Reblogged this on daybydayfatassaway's Blog and commented:
My life to the T.